January 23, 2013

Pitch Wars Entry #35 - CHOOSING CHERRY STREET (MG Contemporary)

NAME: Helen Pyne
MENTOR: Krista Van Dolzer
GENRE: MG contemporary
WORD COUNT: 59,000

Twelve-year-old Max is crushed when his washed-up reality show dad is arrested and sent to rehab. With the help of his homeschooled neighbor, a girl with a lethal allergy to peanuts, he hatches a crazy scheme to fix his family. But when his manipulating dad and a botched theft threaten his plans, Max must choose between family bonds and his conscience. 

FIRST 250: 

“Ready?” his father asked.

Max nodded. He took a deep breath, adjusted his goggles, and pulled out the barrel plug on his marker. His 200-round hopper was full, but he was going to need every bit of that ammunition to finish off their opponents. Next to him, his father stood facing the far end of the outdoor arena where the blue team was positioned, his brawny arms cradling the heavy paintball gun as if it were a plastic toy. Behind the black facemask, his expression was hidden. But that wasn’t all Max couldn’t see. Lately, his dad had been hiding other things as well.

Get a grip, Max told himself. Focus on the game.

“Remember, paintballing is about speed and stealth,” his father said. “When the ref blows the horn, stick close to me. We’ll head for that high rock. It’ll be good cover, and then we can pick off the guys on the blue team as they climb up the hill after us.”

“But Dan said to stick together,” Max said, glancing over at the other dad on their team.
“Yeah and thanks to that doofus and his klutzy sons, we’ve lost the last two games.” 

His father grunted and shook his head. “Don’t listen to him. Remember, I’m the guy who beat out everyone on the reality show. I know what it takes to win.”


Louise Fury said...

Would love to read the full manuscript. Please send it to me in a WORD DOC with the pitch/query letter in the body of the email AND as page 1 of the manuscript. Email: louise@lperkinsagency.com

gailecn said...

I LOVE this! So unique. And it sounds like both a fun and heart-wrenching read.

Helen said...

Thank you both for the comments. This book truly has been a labor of love, and Gail hit the nail on the head when she noted that Cherry Street is supposed to be both “fun” and “heart-wrenching.” Huge kudos to Krista for her extraordinary efforts as an editor, coach and cheerleader. It has been a great privilege to participate in Pitch Wars given the many, many talented contestants and applicants.

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