January 23, 2013

Pitch Wars Entry #29 - TRESPASSERS (YA Fantasy)

NAME: Laurie Dennison
MENTOR: Deana Barnhart
GENRE: YA fantasy
WORD COUNT: 86,000

Hidden beneath the modern world lies Middeah, a forgotten nation that pays for its perfect health and pristine environment by sacrificing outsiders. When Middeah ensnares two teens—Etta, an artist tired of her father’s restrictions, and Graham, the cornerstone of his broken family—they must work together to escape before they’re discovered and killed on the altar stone. But a tempting, new eternal life and a chance at love may be worth the dangers of remaining trespassers.

FIRST 250:
Etta knew better than to paint in the afternoon, but sometimes inspiration just swallowed her up.

Brakes squealed as the truck pulled into the driveway outside. Etta closed her eyes and squeezed her palms against her forehead. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Dad was always home at six on Mondays. She had about three minutes until he walked through the door.

She tossed the paints in her supply basket, grabbed the brushes in a jumbled handful, and sprinted to the bathroom. Blue, green and silvery white swirled beneath the faucet as she rinsed the bristles, twisting into smoky turquoise. Still dripping, she dropped them in their cup and stashed the basket under the sink.

The rattle and thump of the engine dying sounded through the hall. Two minutes.

Back in the kitchen she stole one last look at her piece, a bridge hinting at metal towers on one side, with hungry, overgrown trees and vines reaching across on the other. She grabbed a garbage bag and slid the canvas inside, hoping the tacky splotches wouldn’t stick. Etta carried the package to her room, fell to her knees, and eased it under her bed.

Work boots clomped up the steps. One minute.

She jolted back to the kitchen, sweeping the room for evidence. No signs of creative expression. Then she noticed the streaks of phthalo blue.


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