January 23, 2013

Pitch Wars Entry #23 - SHADE (YA epic fantasy)

Name: Jae Dansie
Mentor's Name: Marieke Nijkamp
Title: SHADE
Genre: YA Epic Fantasy
WORD COUNT: 87,000

PITCH:

Forced to murder his father, a part-demon prince flees home and heritage to find a new life. But when a human girl steals his heart, his demons threaten to leave her world a bloody, barren wasteland. Now, the only way to stop them is to embrace his heritage after all.

FIRST 250:

He could easily end it. Summon a demon, let it gobble up the queen, and enjoy a peaceful supper without her scouring him for imperfection. The servants would probably applaud him.

Summoning a demon? No problem. Stop it from slaughtering everyone including himself, well… that might be a challenge.

The prince gazed at the dark, stone walls of his bedroom. Their rough surfaces were like wrinkled pillows frozen in time—once soft now hard, cold and unforgiving. Not so long ago the prince saw kindness in his mother’s eyes. But those days had faded, growing harder to recall like a dream shortly after waking.

Fifteen servants stood in a rigid line against the far wall as though awaiting execution. Some trembled, others wrung their hands, but all eyes stayed trained on the queen as she prowled around the prince inspecting his preparation. One mistake was all it took to summon her cruelty.

His long, black cape pulled lightly against his shoulders as she examined it. He could tell her to get out. Maybe even slam the door in her face. The courageous corners of his mind surged with exhilaration at the thought, but he remained silent. This was her game. If he wanted to win—truly win—he’d have to play it right.

“I trust gloves were worn during your preparation?”

He tensed. The gentle tone meant to disarm him was poison nectar—sweet to the ears, deadly if believed. But no matter what she tried, he wouldn’t show her anything.

2 comments:

Louise Fury said...

I would love to read the full manuscript. Please include the pitch/query letter in the body of the email AND as page 1 of the manuscript. Please send it to louise@lperkinsagency.com
Thank you!
~Louise

Anonymous said...

Good luck, Jae! You've worked so hard on SHADE. Just stopoping by to show my support. Demon dogs for the win! :)

--Brian--

Post a Comment

 
Design by Free WordPress Themes | Bloggerized by Lasantha - Premium Blogger Themes | Blogger Templates